Sunday, July 29, 2012

R.A.T Rat. Rat Maane Chooha

Oh hello there.
I never knew it would come to this, you know.
That I would become one of those super obnoxious people who would be all friendly, making you listen to all of their stories, when they were down and out. Everyone has that one emotionally needy person, and I am afraid I was yours THAT.
And you would kind of get used to that person, and some of the stories were kinda entertaining. So you would tune in now and then, invite the friend over for a coffee or something.
And then that friend made friends, moved to a cool place, and the phone calls kind of became a monthly feature, and very hurried. The call became an email where s/he would always promise to catch up, perhaps watch a movie together and you would believe them for some time, and wait for that call/email. And then one day you see them at the movies with a group of people and they are having a LOT OF FUN and you catch their eye and they are like "Oh, hell! Would you believe me if I told you...."
Yes, I think you get the picture.
So was I a fair weather friend?
Was this blog just something to fill in time until I learned to love life and live it or whatever the phrase is
I think minor pity parties aside I have been a fairly happy person
So this isnt it. And Delhi though opening up a whole new world to me, and bringing many, many fun people to my life...so that I have a "group" and I have something of a fortnightly salon at my place where a bunch of interesting people come over and we have a nice meal and "scintillating conversation" and I am relaxed as they all appear to love Arhaan and Arhaan them. And I am never stressing about leaving a discussion mid-way for I have to head off home to check on The Man and The Three Year Old for hey, I AM HOME! So yes that is good.
But the city has also allowed me a place where I am at peace at myself. And every Sunday, the three of us give ourselves the GIFT OF GETTING BORED. Its fun, you should try it some time. So you know we decided not to get a TV (also a microwave, and the mobile signal is really crappy in our home, and there is a really ancient phone in the entrance...leading my mother in law to comment it is like entering 1922!) ..so yes I was saying no TV, no going out in the car, it is the help's day off--so no pressure to clean up and look productive so the help doesnt judge us (hey, why pretend? you know we are all afraid of THAT LOOK!) so we lie around in our pyjamas, read the papers, moan and complain about the weather, make plans to youtube SatyamevJayate one of these Sundays, and then move to another room and repeat this process. By evening we are dying to go out for a walk at least, we try walking for a block, quickly give up as it is soo quiet and soo humid. Go home, take a bath and hey actually look forward to Monday! But seriously, it is really nice...it is like a spa for the mind, minus the aromatherapy oils and calculating tips.
I have had a birthday since I last wrote. The Man was away but hey, I trained him well. So there was a surprise gift and later a cake delivered. MY WORK HERE IS DONE. And an aunt-in-law took me out for lunch, and the three year old was invited for a play date so I had some time to just sit and count my blessings. And yes there were a LOT of phone calls and cards and well by the end of the day I just felt very loved and blessed, considering this was the year I thought I would just let it slip under the radar. Please dont hate me. I swear I am not one of the " shiny, happy" people. At least not yet.
And there was Kathmandu for a week to meet a mom who was a-conferencing. There was some more of the "at peace with the world" kind of holidaying, where we just lazed around in a nice serviced apartment in the hills, far, far away from the maddening Kathmandu crowds, cooked our own food, the 3 year old got to watch Ceebeebies the whole time we were there. And we saw the most amazing rainbows.






Case in point.


And then we returned to Delhi, where we were counselled to "be careful about how you (women) dress... Aping the west blindly is eroding our culture and causing such (sex)crimes to happen."
DANG! for you all know it was their sexual liberties and mindless just mindless consumerism that made me move here. Ab yaha bhi chador dhoondni paryegi.


And I hear now that Islam too has made it this side of Wagah and alas this means one too  has to fast.
Yaar.

So it is Ramzan for us.
And I think I am doing OK.

Other than preparing to call-in THIS Mufti saheb,
the ticker says something like Saudi Arabia's famous mufti broke into tears on live TV when a Somalian Muslim asked him whether his fast can be considered a fast if he has not eaten anything for sehri and iftar (the morning meal and the one with which we break our fast).
Leading to the meme YOU COULD BUY PAKORAS RATHER THAN SPENDING THE MONEY ON AN INTERNATIONAL PHONE CALL.






Actually the mufti broke into tears because I kept on quizzing him whether my fast could still be considered one as I have impure thoughts all the time after youtubing David Beckham in THAT suit steering THAT speedboat and oh Bhaijaan ki smile. MASHERZZZZ!!

Also  this evening as I started composing this blog entry, a mouse broke into the study...I obviously screamed and the security guard ran in. He asked for a broom and swung around a cane. And then the 3 Year Old exhibiting really quick thinking grabbed his flute. PIED PIPER FOR THE WORLD..and there was I screaming instructions,  the guard thrashing about with the broom and the 3 Year Old screeching away merrily at the flute. The mouse was caught and released to the wild. And Master A started whooping "IT WORKED IT WORKED"



So yes, you were saying 
How come I dont write any more?

Need more laughs?
Watch this